Bucket list

Crossing items off a list brings my lizard brain a great deal of joy. Crossing off bucket list items is pure exhilaration. No, I'm not going to space although I still hope in my lifetime it's possible for average people like me to visit the stars. I keep doing so in my dreams, and for now I'm content with that. Perhaps it's worth its own post in the future.

As a kid I read, From The Mixed Up Files of Basil E. Frankweiler so many bloody times, the librarian gave me a copy when they retired the book from circulation at my college graduation. I gifted it to a child when I was traveling. I'm hoping some kid is reading that copy under a blanket with a flashlight, but I digress. 

It's happening though, I'm visiting Wales and staying at Gladstone's Library. While at the library, I will seek out Arthurian legend, Chaucer contemporaries, and local Welsh lore. I also have visits to Talacre lighthouse (another bucket list item in the subset of lighthouses), and some castles in the area weather permitting of course. 

I haven't done this in a really long time, but I'm going to take my camera and scope out some wildlife. I'll find some deer paths and try to capture some of the local fauna and landscapes. If my knees cooperate, I might take in some elevation and put some miles on my boots. I'm looking forward to my visit and possibly making some new friends. Okay, maybe that's a bit ambitious, but I will say hello to people and introduce myself to them before asking about their dog. (Progress, right?!)

Any how, I've booked all the things and am patiently waiting for this well-earned trip. I'll be sure to share this journey with you in my next entry. If you can't already tell, I've taken a great deal of time to heal and process over the past few years. I fully expect to post here on a regular basis and appear sporadically on social media. 

Daydreams

I get caught daydreaming a lot. When I say a lot, I mean when I'm speaking, sometimes mid-sentence, I trail off to my own little world. I stare and come back to my original thought. My social media friend posted something from NASA about Jupiter. I commented on how I often daydream about what it would be like to visit the other planets and surf the atmosphere of the gas giants in some sort of space vessel. I don't know why I daydream about space so much.

My life as it is, is fulfilling. I get to help people at work on a daily basis and feel like I'm contributing to the success of the younger people that I'm mentoring. I have a social life that doesn't stress me out. It's the perfect balance between my tendency to hermit crab and improving social mores without masking it all. 

Real life is finally satisfying. I wasn't sure if I'd get here after falling so far after my exit from collegiate sports. I think I daydream because I can't read books all the time. I would miss my stop, get hit by a car or fired. Some people draw or make music to express their creative side. Daydreaming is my art because we all know I don't sing or draw so well. Maybe one day, I'll be able to project my thoughts directly from my brain. For now, you get my spectacularly bland writing. Here's some Proust for seasoning.

“When a mind has a tendency towards day-dreams, it’s a mistake to shield it from them, to ration them. So long as you divert your mind from its day-dreams, it will not know them for what they are; you will be the victim of all sorts of appearances because you will not have grasped their true nature. If a little day-dreaming is dangerous, the cure for it is not to dream less but to dream more, to dream all the time.”

― Marcel Proust